Kobe Bryant Controls the Flow of All Information


Kobe’s wittle pinky has been hurt for awhile. We know this. What we didn’t know is if he was going to have surgery to fix the problem or if it was going to be a footnote on every bad shooting night for the rest of his career. Well the jig is up, and Dobermamba has decided to go under the knife…at a completely undisclosed time. But all is not lost! Kobes has left us a trail of clues to check his website (www.kb24.com) every twenty minutes for the next three weeks so we can find out precisely when the oft-proclaimed best in the biz will get his little finger all fixed up.

Does Kobe’s site need the hits that badly? Is he not getting the ad revenue he wants? Or is this just a strange power play to keep his name in the offseason headlines?

Kobe. Dude. Let me tell you a little secret. This is the off-season. I’ve read more posts and articles about Ron Artest’s haircut than any human should. Darnell Jackson is frontpage material. When you’re an NBA superduperstar, you don’t have to do much to make the news. Your surgery would be on ESPN for a week regardless of this whole charade. So cut the theatrics, eh?

Seth Carstens