A long time ago, before the internet existed, today was known simply as Thursday. It was a normal day and people went to work and people went to school and people complained about work and people complained about school. But then Al Gore came along and blessed us with the internet and from that day forth, the day we called Thursday was no more. A new era had begun, and Thursday was no longer just another day filling the weeks and years until our inevitable doom. No, Thursday was transformed into Throwback Thursday, and we rejoiced. For on Throwback Thursday we could share old pictures and videos and for a few hours every week have something to take our minds off the drudgery of every day life.
A great thing—perhaps the most important thing—about Throwback Thursday is that for one day a week, it allows us to have fun on the internet. One of the rules of the internet is that there is no fun and joking allowed–but on Throwback Thursday all the rules change and we can laugh and have a good time. It’s why we all love today so much and why we must continue to put in the work necessary to keep the tradition alive.
With the great power of the internet bestowed upon me by our lord and savior Al Gore, I have the great responsibility of continuing and strengthening the tradition of Throwback Thursday, so I have come here today to do just that.
Here we have a very important video to look at. Yep, you guessed it: JaVale McGee, Nick Young and Gilbert Arenas playing paintball. I mean there isn’t a whole lot to say about it, to be honest. Like, the video starts off with JaVale and Nick–decked out in vests and masks–walking into the facility chanting, “WHO’S HOUSE? OUR HOUSE!” What else could you ever need?
So take a break from your boring job, tune out that dumb professor, ignore your wack roommate and focus on what’s important in life: honoring the tradition of Throwback Thursday.