Larry Bird: “I’ve Never Felt Pressure.”

Image courtesy of @tjmanotoc

Image courtesy of @tjmanotoc

The Indiana Pacers and Houston Rockets are in Manila, the Philippines for a preseason game that will take place at 7 PM local time on Thursday (7:30 AM Eastern for those of us stateside). The Philippines are a hotbed for basketball fandom, as evidenced by the fact that Larry Bird, currently serving as Indiana’s president of basketball operations, held a scheduled press conference. It’s not every locale that would go out of its way to hold a press event for a front office executive, but of course, Bird is no ordinary white collar worker. He’s the living legend, a man so extraordinarily confident in his skills that he’d choose to shoot with his off-hand just to reinforce his superiority — a superiority, mind you, that no one in their right mind would question.

And Bird spit hot fire, Dylan-style, when the mics were on. Courtesy of @poormanscommish:

Make sure to check out the rest of Bird’s quotes on poormanscommish’s timeline; he discussed topics ranging from the mindset of a championship team to the influence of the Dream Team on the level of international play. And it’s downright impressive how much Filipinos love the game, particularly those players whose excellence spans the globe and withstands the ravages of time.

Bird was mostly joking; he reportedly laughed and smiled after his typically Bird-esque response. But really, this is your reminder that you will never, ever be as cool as Larry Bird.

Andrew Lynch

When God Shammgod created the basketball universe, Andrew Lynch was there. His belief in the superiority of advanced statistics and the eventual triumph of expected value-based analytics stems from the fact that he’s roughly as old as the concept of counting. With that said, he still loves the beauty of basketball played at the highest level — it reminds him of the splendor of the first Olympics — and the stories that spring forth from the games, since he once beat Homer in a game of rock-paper-scissors over a cup of hemlock. Dude’s old.