When it comes to love stories, there is no universal recipe, but there are definitely a couple that never work!
Both originate from our furthest reaches childhood experience, And this is from the relationship that we were able to establish with our parents during the first years of our lives.
In fact, whether we like it or not, We learn our way of loving from the way our parents loved us. Either by imitation or in return.
In the first case, that is, in the case of love by imitation, we learned A.S Positive love model Which we will also try to replicate with our partners. But in the second case, let’s try Love did not make us happy or whose power we have never realized and, therefore, have decided never to exercise.
Obviously, these two positions important implications for our adult lives, Also because it leads us to make choices we’re not aware of and to continue relationships with dynamics that are not entirely healthy.
Complete and comprehensive love
If we have a very intimate and very satisfying relationship with our parents, We felt so alone with them. So we were lucky enough Experience complete and unconditional love, which we have always been able to count on.
Also as is natural, if this kind of love has made us very happy, we will also try and replicate it in our adult romantic relationships. You merge emotionally with the person next to us Or at least you like it. The danger is We canceled it permanently In the relationship between the spouses and lose ourselves, become Depends on the partner.
love of avoidance
If the relationship with our parents wasn’t completely satisfying emotionally, this one was left A deep wound in our mind. We’ve come to think of it Not worthy enough to deserve love Thus, all those who say they love us are actually lying or that they will hurt us sooner or later, just as our parents did.
In this case We fail to build a loving relationship based on trust. We always tend to push others away, leaving our partners at the slightest sign of a broken relationship, in a word, preferring to flee rather than risk being injured. The problem is You risk being very lonely In this way: it is very important to learn to give others a little confidence!
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