15-Footer 1/6/12: A Night To Remember

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So, so many games. I may overlook the finer points, but then again, people seem to forget that Jeffrey Daniels (above in the video) taught Michael Jackson the Moonwalk…

Detroit Pistons vs Philadelphia 76ers (7pm EST)

Jason Maxiell was once considered an up-and-coming big man. Naturally Joe Dumars re-signed him and he’s been terrible ever since. Evan Turner’s baby face better watch out though, Jason loves the flesh of infants…

Detroit Bad Bays

New York Knickerbockers vs. Washington Wizards Bullets (7pm EST)

Turiaf’s Reven… oh that’s right, he’s hurt. Earlier than normal in the season, too. Oh well.

New Jersey Nets vs. Toronto Raptors (7pm EST)

Do you recall that night, that very special night when Andrea Bargnani grabbed 17 rebounds? Nah, I don’t either. Took me totally by surprise, actually. If only Brook Lopez weren’t hurt. We could gather the family ’round the TV to enjoy the spectacle.

But seriously, Bargnani will probably eat the Nets front court alive for 25 points and 8 rebounds. He’s a different player so far this year. Thanks Dwane Casey!

Atlanta Hawks vs. Charlotte Bobcats (7pm EST)

Remember that one time Boris Diaw nearly got a triple double… and then followed that up by grabbing 16 rebounds the next night? It was last week.  At least he didn’t string anyone along in his subsequent, disappointing collapse. The Knicks sure know how to rejuvenate a season!

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Indiana Pacers vs. Boston Celtics (7:30pm EST)

STIEMSMA!

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Really, I love this kid even if he does sound like an eye disease. He should be getting as many minutes as he can sop up in stead of Jermaine’s corpse.

Denver Nuggets vs. New Orleans Hornets (8pm EST)

It wasn’t that long ago that the Nuggets obliterated the Hornets in the playoffs. The casts may have changed, but the ending will probably be the same. Faried will break them.

Cleveland Cavaliers vs. Minnesota Timberwolves (8 pm EST)

The ghosts of Wolves past will return to the Twin Cities. Will Ryan Hollins inexplicably play more minutes than Kevin Love to remind us of the good times? Or will Ramon Sessions break Rubio’s ankles in order to show he should have been Minnesota’s franchise point guard?

Plus there’s potential fireworks from Derrick Williams and Tristan Thompson. I bet this ends up being the game of the night!

Chicago Bulls vs. Orlando Magic (8pm EST)

I can’t help but wonder how much better off the Bulls would be right now if they had just offered J.J. Redick enough money to ward off the Magic a couple of offseasons ago. Rip Hamilton’s still ok, however his basketball skills are diminishing especially when he’s not leading mutinies.  Redick is shooting it lights out this year and will only get better.

Furthermore, JJ is easy on the eyes while Hamilton is a milkdud head with a face mask.

Houston Rockets vs. Oklahoma City Thunder (8pm EST)

The Thunder’s trio of Harden, Durant and Westbrook draw fouls at prodigious rates. Meanwhile in Clutch City…

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Memphis Grizzlies vs Utah Jazz (9pm EST)

The curiously curious front court rotation of Utah will continue to guffaw, while Memphis continues to acclimate to life without Z-Bo with Speights parachuting in from Philly to stopgap. Watching Zach Randolph and Al Jefferson bear down on each other would have been great, though. Jeff Ruland – James Edwards level great:

Photo from Philly Burbs

Portland Trail Blazers vs. Phoenix Suns (10:30pm EST)

The Suns make no sense. Only one player is averaging over 30 minutes a night (Dudley). Their leading rebounder is Channing Frye at 8.7 per game. Hakim Warrick paces all scorers with 13 a game. Most shocking is Nash shooting 42% from the field.

However, Stevie is shooting 56% over the last two games. I suspect good things are gonna happen tonight for the Nashettes. Portland has to be tired from the thorough trouncing they gave the Lakers.

Golden State Warriors vs. Los Angeles Lakers (10:30pm EST)

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Get well, Steph.

Seth Carstens