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Profile Paroxysm: Sitting down with Chris Douglas-Roberts, Part 1: Pressure

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Ed. Note: We’re very pleased to have the opportunity to bring you a one-on-one interview with Chris Douglas-Roberts. Longtime friend of the site, Fred Katz, had a lengthy chat over the phone with CDR this week. We’ve broken it up into three parts; this is the first part.

Here’s a little bit about Fred: Fred Katz averaged almost one point per game in fifth grade, but he maintains that his per-36-minute numbers were astonishing. Find more of his work at Bleacher Report, RotoWire and ClipperBlog.com. Follow him on Twitter at @FredKatz.

Fred Katz: Does Michael Jordan ever practice with you guys?

Chris Douglas-Roberts: [laughs] Nah. We don’t see Mike in practice. He might just show up at a game. Tremendous pressure playing in front of Michael Jordan.

Katz: What’s that like playing with the greatest watching you?

Douglas-Roberts: Subconsciously, you feel some type of way about playing in front of him. You can’t really explain it. You know what I mean? Because it’s like, “That’s Michael Jordan.” To me, he was a perfect player. So is he watching dissecting your every move? You want to know what he’s thinking, but then again, you don’t want to know what he’s thinking.

Katz: You’ve got some pretty original hair. What’s the name of your hairstyle?

Douglas-Roberts: The CDR. [laughs]

Katz: We’re calling it the CDR?

Douglas-Roberts: That’s what we’re going with. It’s like dreadlocks on top and it’s even all around. I’ve always been this type of guy. I just don’t really care [what people think], you know?

Katz: How often do you have to get it styled to maintain it?

Douglas-Roberts: Once a month. I got a haircut today, but it’s just to keep me clean around the edges. But once a month, actually. It’s the dreadlocks.

Katz: It’s almost like the dread flat top.

Douglas-Roberts: Yeah, yeah. Have you ever put into Twitter “Chris Douglas-Roberts hair”? If you ever want to do that for a laugh, do it. People either love it or hate it. More people, I think, hate it.

Katz: What’s the funniest reaction you’ve seen anyone have to your hair?

Douglas-Roberts: Somebody on Twitter put my face on Dave Chappelle when he’s playing Reggie in the Nutty Professor. They put my face on him. It was hilarious. They do all kinds of stuff. I’ve heard all the jokes about my hair. In Miami, they were calling me Prince, the guys in the front row…The fans are brutal. Opposing team’s fans are brutal, man. It’s funny, man. I laugh at it. I can’t act like it’s not funny. I mean, the guy called me Prince. That’s funny to me.

Katz: Who has the best hair in the NBA?

Douglas-Roberts: I have to go with my teammate, Josh McRoberts. He spends time on it. He’s very aware of it, and he’s always styling it. He’s always asking me, “How does my hair look?” before games. So I have to go with Josh. And then, it’d have to be me.

Katz: Josh McRoberts asks about his hair before games?

Douglas-Roberts: Yeah, right before the games. [impression] “Hey, hey, hey. How does my hair look?” It looks great, Josh.

Katz: He’s got the perfect beard complement, too.

Douglas-Roberts: Oh yeah. Josh McRoberts is wavy, man. He’s a wavy guy. He’s a one-of-one. He’s special.

Katz: With that hair, he looks like Jason Schwartzman.

Douglas-Roberts: [laughs] Yeah. He says he’s never cutting it, too. I told him, don’t. Don’t cut it.

Katz: He couldn’t look more different than he did when he was at Duke.

Douglas-Roberts: I know. But Duke is not having that. He broke loose after Duke. That’s the real Josh McRoberts we’ve got here.

Katz: LeBron dropped 61 on you guys the other night. I know Michael Kidd-Gilchrist was on him most of the night, but you had to guard him a little bit. What was going through your head as he was on the way to 61?

Douglas-Roberts: Actually, you kind of know. You kind of know when guys are in a rhythm. He was in 10 times more of a rhythm than he’s usually in. You just know that being a player. And I know Bronny. I’ve known Bronny since I was in high school. So I’ve been watching him so long that I can kind of just tell the game is coming too easy for him. You know what I mean?

It wasn’t because of our defense. We were playing the best defense that we could. But when he’s making jumpers, you can’t do anything. That’s what happened. He started out making jumpers. He was hitting tough jumpers. He was hitting threes. He was hitting tough threes. And you can’t do anything about that. I got my first piece of him in the fourth quarter, and he was really aggressive. But to be honest, it was fun to me. He already had 56 or whatever. At that time, he was already out of his mind. Luckily, I can say he got four on me. You know, now I can tell my son, “He only had four.”

Hardwood Paroxysm