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Lion Face Lemon Face 12/26/13: Jeff Teague Had Himself Quite A Night

There were only four games last night, but a lot of stuff happened. The Hawks and Cavaliers had to go through two overtimes to determine a winner, the Rockets somehow beat the Grizzlies despite playing terribly, Danny Green came back into our lives and helped the Spurs beat the Mavericks and the Clippers lost another thriller, this time against the Trailblazers.

Amongst all that drama were a pair of record breaking performances, a severely broken ankle (not really), an unfortunate injury to one of the best big men in the game and a game-winner, so without further ado, let’s get to it.

Lion Face: James Harden’s (boring but amazing) record

James Harden scored a game-high 27 points against the Grizzlies on Thursday, but he did it on just two made field goals and 22-for-25 shooting from the charity stripe. To no surprise, he became the first player in NBA history to score 27 points in a game while making only two field goals. It’s an insanely boring record to watch because, well, who wants to watch someone shoot 25 free throws and score only 27 points? But it’s very impressive, nonetheless. And the Rockets won the game even though Dwight Howard barely played because of foul trouble, so there’s that.

Lemon Face: The Orlando Magic are the worst team ever

It’s incredible to think that, while everyone else in the league has played around 30 games heading into 2014, the Orlando Magic have logged 88. And jeez, who decided to give them that tough of a schedule anyway? It’s almost like David Stern wants them to lose, am I right? But luckily for them, they’ve got another 100-something games in the second half of the season to get some more wins, so don’t feel so bad for them. And hey, with that many games, maybe, JUST MAYBE, they’ll make the Playoffs. It is the East after all.

Public Service Announcement: That was all sarcasm. All of it. Not one thing I just wrote was true.

Lion Face: Tony Parker’s unintentional wizardry

There’s no way that this was intentional. It can’t be. But for the sake of our entertainment, let’s just say that it was. And if it actually was, would it be the assist of the year? Because that’s very fancy from Tony. You know Manu Ginobili is jealous that he hadn’t thought of doing that.

Tony Parker, basketball wizard.

Lemon Face: Al Horford gets injured

With 1:48 to go in the first overtime, Al Horford collided with Anderson Varejao while trying to get a steal on the inbounds, injured his shoulder and had to be taken out of the game straight away. There’s no word on how long he’ll be out for, but it didn’t look good. Here’s to hoping that he’s okay, but damn you for the millionth time, injuries.

Lion Face: JEFF TEAGUE

While one Teague is on his way to the D-League to try and get his career on track, the other is torching all-stars and looking like one of the best young point guards in the game. In a loss on Monday, Jeff Teague put up 26 points and eight assists against the Miami Heat and on Thursday, he scored 34 points and dished out a career-high 14 assists against the Cleveland Cavaliers. He also hit a tough three to force a second overtime in that Cavs game, as well as a game-winning step-back jumper over Tristan Thompson, which hit the rim about twenty times before going in.

Lemon Face: Chris Paul’s awesome night goes to waste

34 points, 16 assists and six steals in 44 minutes. Chris Paul put in work against the Trailblazers. But unfortunately, it came in a losing effort, thanks to Batum’s three to force overtime and Aldridge’s 32 points. But Paul did make a little history along the way by joining John Stockton and Isiah Thomas as the only players in NBA history to put up that kind of gaudy stat-line in a game, so that might take a little bit of the edge off the loss. Nah? Chris Paul is still not happy? Oh, well.

Lion Face: Danny Green returns

It’s been kind of a tough season for young Danny Green thus far. After breaking Ray Allen’s record in the finals six months ago, he’s seen his minutes dwindle down as of late and go to another sharp shooter in Marco Belinelli. But he came back into our lives on Thursday when he scored 22 points in 27 minutes off the bench on some perfect 5-for-5 shooting from three. Let’s hope that the real Danny is here to stay now and not this “I’m still pretty good, but not as good as I was last season” knockoff that the Spurs have been putting out there over these first 30 games.

Lemon Face: Jeff Teague gets his ankles tore up

Jeff Teague had himself a game, but he had to guard Kyrie Irving for 45 minutes and when you have to guard Kyrie Irving for 45 minutes, there’s a pretty good chance that you’ll fall victim to his filthy crossover. Jeff Teague learnt that the hard way.

BUT DON’T WORRY, EVERYONE because his ankles are a-okay.

Thanks to r/NBA for the GIFs.

Scott Rafferty