Morning Bell – 12.01.09

SOMETIMES

You just gotta shave your armpits.  It’s an old saying.

ABOUT BASKETBALL

Last night was a good night to go to bed early.

WHY?

The first two games went down to the buzzer.  The second two, they did not.

ALSO

It twas a night of “REALLY?” games.

REALLY LINDSAY HUNTER?

You’re taking a penultimate shot to close the lead?  This isn’t 1997, Lindsay Hunter.  Cool rebound though.

AND REALLY BRAD MILLER?

Bro, we both know you can shoot a 17-footer.  So shoot it 17 feet.

I MEAN REALLY EDDIE JORDAN

You’re trying to win the game with a long Grimace three, and not something near the basket when he’s one of the most athletic guys playing professional basketball?  I guess that makes sense when you consider that Grimace is a bad three-point shooter who is having his worst year ever from behind the stripe.

WAIT

That doesn’t make sense.

EXACTLY

He’s not Billbert Barenas or Professor Threepointerstons, Eddie Jordan.  But he is strong and can jump a lot.  Maybe get him near the rim next time.

BIG UP YOURSELF

Monta Ellis (45/5/1).  Carlos Boozer (24/15/7).  Kelly Dwyer (22/15/3).  Jason Kidd (22/6/11).

CHILL OUT

JJ Barea, with your low-top almost Nike Dunks.  Charlie Bell, with your looking like an emaciated Kurt Thomas.  Ersan Ilyasova, with your jumpshot like a kid in gym class who wears jeans under his gym shorts.  Juwan Howard.

Seth Carstens