15 Footer 1.8.09

Getting an early start on the 15 today… cause I gave up slacking for New Year’s. If you aren’t watching the BCS National Championship game like every other sports fan in America (including Moore and myself – since we have money on it. psst… don’t tell Paroxi-wife), then enjoy these two games – sacrificed by David Stern & Co.

There’s a First Time for Everything
NYK @ Dallas, 8:30est


Yeah, you just got Foreigner! Live! Don’t say HP doesn’t love you, baby!

D’Antoni’s back in Dallas and I expect ultimate calamity. Chris Duhon running circle around J-Kidd. A 45 point game from Dirk. A trade at halftime that sends David Lee, Nate Robinson and an au paire to Dallas for JubJub, Brandon Bass, a new lawnmower and a premiere Netflix subscription. Josh Howard’s head exploding in a fit of sudden vertigo at finding himself incapable of scoring on Wilson freakin’ Chandler! In truth, this game should be a force of deterrence. The Mavs will use their small roster, efficient ball movement and toughness against, well, SSOLNY (it’s like the bastard cousin of CSINY… on meth).

On a side note, good thing UT sux and didn’t make it to the NCAA Championship Game — more butts in seats at the American Airlines Arena. Cuban FTW. Cuban, always, FTW!

BREAKING NEWS! BREAKING NEWS!
LAC @ San Antonio, 8:30est


This just in. Everyone on the Clippers team has accepted the Spurs offer of declaring the game a tie. What’s that you say? A Tie? Yes. In a gesture of good faith, the international leadership of the Spurs (Duncan, Parker, Ginobli) negotiated in good faith so that uber-Americans like Boom Dizzle, Camby and Ricky Davis could all kick back and watch OU/UF tonight, at home, in their giant personal movie theaters (ZOMG – Fat Free Popcorn and Diet Soda at Dizzle’s!). Who says international affairs are on rocky terms. Heck, an act like this even gives me faith that, perhaps, the Spurs are not soul sucking, fun hating, puppy killing basketball fascists.

Oh wait, that last paragraph didn’t actually happen. But, in reality, the Clippers will be taking this one off and the Spurs will roll slowly over their limp, lifeless bodies. AKA – just like every other Clippers/Spurs game. Or, surprise Clippers upset! Just go watch the BCS and wait til tomorrow, weirdos!

Seth Carstens